My Authentic “Bad Ass” Self

Posted on March 5th, 2012 by & filed under A Year With Myself, Everything Miz Meliz

“Authenticity: Emphasizing What Makes You Different”

In the past few weeks I have evaluated my strengths and looked at the things that I am passionate about. This week I am thinking about what it means to be authentic and what makes me different.

I agree with C.A. Kabu who says that authenticity is a funny thing. She says, “You know it if it’s there, and you definitely know when it’s not. Defining authenticity requires much introspection. You have to think about your character, your values, your strengths, and their intersections. Eventually, you realize that the definition of authenticity is perhaps simpler than you expected. You can, for instance, reach the conclusion that being authentic is actually related to having a sense of who you are and sharing it with the world without reservations.”

Considering this helped me to determine why I should care about being authentic, how I can fully embrace my uniqueness, and how my life can change when I remain true to myself.

As I mentioned in a previous post, I have a kinda “been here, done this” feeling as I go through these exercises. I have been enjoying going through old journals and comparing my perceptions of my life from ten years ago to now. Some of the questions I asked myself back in 2001 are very similar to the introspective I am working on now. What fascinates me most is that even though I am most definitely in a different place now than I was back then, and I have changed and matured in many ways, the core of my being, my beliefs and values are very much the same. I do live an authentic life. It is when I lose sight of who I am and who I strive to be, that things get difficult.

In 2001, I asked myself the following questions at the beginning of a journal that I called. “I Love My Life.”  By answering these questions, I was able to determine who I was and who I wanted to be.  I believe this is when I embraced authenticity and learned to love myself.

  • Is my overall outlook on life marked by hope and optimism?
  • Are there things in my life that I am passionate about?
  • At the conclusion of a day or week, do I often have a warm sense of satisfaction about my accomplishments and contributions?
  • Can I become very still and experience a sense of peace?
  • Do some parts of my life bring me a healthy sense of pride? 

    What makes me different from all the rest? I see beauty in everyTHING!


You Are a Snowflake, Right?

By Karen Caterson

Hi, Snowflake. You are a snowflake, right?

We all are! I mean, we’re all unique, beautiful, one-of-a-kind—just like snowflakes.

Of course, all of us gorgeous, individual snowflakes are also part of our culture, our society—our SNOW.

And there are a lot of wonderful things about SNOW. Joining with other snowflakes can be fun (think snow forts, snow fights, snow angels, and snowmen).

Purposely looking for how we think and feel differently can seem very odd, but continued mindfulness and curious reflection about our differences (our uniqueness) will grow into being more comfortable with our snowflake-ness… and that will grow into our snowflake beauty being emphasized naturally.

There is no one in this world that is exactly like me. My thoughts and feelings are entirely my own. Sometimes I feel like there are no original ideas. I strive to be different. I want to stand out. I want to shine. If I have an idea, I Google it. I am always disappointed, but not surprised, that someone somewhere has already thought of it. As a young person, I thought I was a trend-setter. Truthfully, I was trendy. But I spent a lot of time with people who weren’t so they thought I was the fashion-forward person. Did that make me a poser? No way! I always knew what I liked and I was not afraid to be me. I think that is what being authentic means. Not being afraid to stand up for oneself and being courageous enough to show your true colors.

I would say that I am off the charts when it comes to living my life authentically. Do I sound conceited? Why shouldn’t I have a sense of self-pride? I just did some serious soul-searching about what makes me unique and special. I can’t get over my bad self right now! I am on this! Right? Well, okay. The truth is sometimes, it fluctuates. I feel that lost feeling, like I am feeling my way through a forest. Things don’t always go my way. I resist or try to control things. I fall short of my potential. I start to listen to that critical inner voice. When I remember how good things truly are and I remember my focus, I can find my path fairly easily.

Right now the path is illuminated with those new bulbs that are supposed to last six times as long as the old kind and be more energy-efficient. . . and I see where I am going. It’s a lovely road that includes a lot of fun stops along the way. In six months from now I would like to be writing regularly and maintaining my blog while maintaining the balance of managing a home with three teen boys and working full-time. My goal for this period of time is to give each area of my life my all. Mostly, I want to be happy, keep up the energy that I am experiencing now, and stay true to myself. And as C.A. Kobu says, “When you are in touch with who you really are and welcome your authentic self with open arms, your life acquires a different and marvelous flow, and you feel oh so good!” Oh yeah! I sure do!

Visit Karen Caterson at Square-Peg People

See C.A. Kobu flourish at http://wakeupandflourish.com/

 

Spring Cleaning or March Madness?

Posted on March 4th, 2012 by & filed under Everything Miz Meliz

The birds are singing, it is a beautiful sunny day!

Is that Spring on the way?

As Spring approaches the idea of “Spring Cleaning” comes to mind. Unfortunately, my home is always in need of a good cleaning, and a complete overhaul sounds daunting. The thought is somewhat stressful even. Where should I begin? I look around and everything I look at needs to be cleaned, repaired, removed or replaced. It is overwhelming. I can’t get away from it. I don’t want to be around it. I try to find a clean space to work, to read, to write, to think. Anything and everything I do is haunted by the thought, “I should clean up first,” or “I don’t deserve to spend so much time writing and doing my own things – I can’t even keep a clean house.” Even my kids know that they can’t have a friend over until the house is cleaned up. Cleaning for company is the best motivator. One of the reasons I enjoy having parties at my house is getting everything spic and span. That thought excites me. Why can’t I plan on the unexpected company? Why can’t I always be ready for a party? The guilt sets in.

I grew up in a clean and orderly home.

My childhood home was not obsessively clean or spotless, but well-kept. I do not remember there being clutter all around, or piles of clothing or dishes. My mother kept a good routine of weekly cleaning and a daily up keep. My father was what we called a “pack rat” and liked to keep things that he could use again someday. Now they call that “re-purpose.” He was ahead of his time. My mother did not hold on to things very long. She kept things that were important to her like a wedding invitation or a photograph, but she tossed out cards and letters and movie tickets and junk. She liked things clean and presentable.

Why Do We Have So Much Junk?

By today’s standards, some would say that my Dad was a hoarder. I don’t agree. He honestly kept things that he thought were still useful. He was using jelly jars to hold nails, nuts and bolts long before anyone would think it clever to do so. He nailed the lids to the bottom of a shelf above his work bench in our garage, so the jars could hang from it. He could clearly see what was inside. Mom would say, “That’s tacky!” “Get rid of that junk!” We can afford to buy something nice.”

I save things. It is a big thrill when someone says, I wish I had a string or a tiny cup or a matchbox and I can provide that thing for them. I am always prepared. Need a key chain? No problem. A magnet? Got that. Envelope? Of course! Nothing comes close to the excitement of finding that thing and being able to use it again. Thinking, “A-ha! I knew it! I am glad I held on to that.” Here in lies the problem, the worst is when I know I have it . . . somewhere. I just saw it. I can never find things when I need them. Where is that. . .? Things are getting out of control. Now it is hoarding. Now it’s junk. There is clutter everywhere. It started in the junk drawer and closet, now it has taken over the whole house and is moving outside. It’s in my car, in my purse, in my head.

The good news is, I can take care of this. It’s just a bunch of junk. It does not define me. It does not control me. Spring is approaching. I am going to declare a mutiny on clutter this month. My March Madness begins today. I am going to make this a challenge.

The mission, should you choose to accept it. . . clear the clutter, clear the mind.

Company is Coming!

I am going to take on the mindset that “Company is coming.” I want to live my best life. I aim to bring my best self in all areas of my life. I am a good mom. I am a good wife. I give my best at work. I have discovered my passion. I am writing and I am helping others. It is time to clean up the cobwebs. . . and the sorrows.

There is significance in everything.

When I was a girl, my mom would have me help her clean the sofa every Spring. We would actually bring it outside on the patio. We would take off all the cushions. She would sweep the sofa with a broom, wipe it down with a damp cloth dipped in a mixture of water and Ivory dish soap, and let it dry in the sun. Our sofa had about twenty cushions. She would take each one and beat it with the broom. Dust would fly out everywhere. I was always amazed at how much dust there was! I would think, “Why are we doing this? It looks clean to me. She cleans it every week.” Then I would see that dust and besides being grossed out (I really hate dust!) I would be amazed at how dirty the sofa had become. That dirt and dust was there the whole time. It made the sofa look dingy and dull. All the dust accumulated and was stuck below the surface, in the creases and crevices and spaces in between the cushions. This was not a slip cover couch like we have today. There was no easy way to clean it. It was a messy and tedious job. I think my mother liked cleaning it. At least she liked having it clean. She may not have thought about it in a romantic way as I do. But it was the source of comfort and a symbol of stability in our family.

The sofa was the center of our home. Literally at the center of our home, it was also the heart of our home. We used our living room. It was our family room, formal sitting room, and guest room. It was a big sectional sofa. We had a big family and it was a term of endearment for one to say, “I have slept on that couch.” Those words meant so much to my parents. They welcomed everyone. If you needed a place to stay, you could always sleep on our couch. It was big enough for three people to sleep comfortably. And many families have used it.

I believe that objects absorb thoughts and feelings as well as hold memories.

I’m Not Just Talking About the Dust

My mother cleaning off the sofa and beating the dust and dirt out of it holds a deeper meaning. During the year many times that couch was a place where tears were shed, hearts were broken, arguments were held, dreams were shattered. There were happy moments as well. But in beating out the dust and grime, we are able to recall the goodness and joyful moments with clarity. The surfaces are prepared to receive more and there is space for more things to happen.

But what happens to all the dust? Where does all the dirt and grime go? I would watch it fly around in the air. When you look at a beam of sunlight you can see it floating around. Sometimes it is quite dense. Particles of who knows what are always floating around us. Molecules of debris, pollen, tiny bits and pieces just floating in the air. We breathe it. It settles on shelves and tables and counter tops. It is everywhere, always. When we clean it up, we are just moving it around. It won’t ever go away. We can sweep it up, put it in a dust pan, and throw it in the trash. But it is now in a bigger pile in the trashcan. And more will accumulate. It will never go away.

If you think about your life as a sofa like the one in my childhood home, realize that you can clean it, dust it, wipe it down with soap and water, even beat it with a broom and there will always be some tiny particles of the crap left behind. Even if it is bleached and purified or even if a brand new one replaces it, the crap always comes back. If we let it accumulate it gets dingy and heavy with the pain, the hurt, the losses, the anger, the confusion, the guilt and all that stuff that we carry. It doesn’t have to be a deep seeded problem or issue. It can be all the little things piled up that get overwhelming. Pile a couple of the big things on top of that and it can crush you. There is a reason my mom enjoyed cleaning that sofa.

I believe I can enjoy cleaning up the clutter in my life. I need to take this final step in order to truly enjoy the good things in life. I look forward to beating the cushions. I can beat this. In fact, I imagine I will get a lot of aggression out when I do! I will beat that crap down! I know it will keep coming back, it always does. But I will accept the mission, take on the challenge, and I will be ready for company. Let the March Madness begin!

Now What?

Great ideas, huh? But I come back to the question, how do I get started? Somewhere I have a book about cleaning up the clutter and getting organized. I am sure I clipped an article about it. I remember watching an episode of Oprah on the subject. What was that? Damned if I can find any of that now! I am defeated before I even begin. Okay brain. Think, think, think. Maybe I can Google it. Oh, I better not! I’ll end up looking at Facebook, Tweeting and Pinning all day! Please, Lord, let this be one of those times where I can find what I need when I actually need it. . . I’ve got this.

I will use these steps that I have filed in my brain to clean up and get my act together. I don’t need a book or a guru – I know what needs to be done. I know what works for me. If you want to take the challenge, you can use my list, or make a plan of your own. But there must be a plan.

HERE IS THE PLAN:

Step One: Survey the Damage

I am going to really look at my surroundings and decide what I want to accomplish. I know I can’t remove, repair and replace everything now. I can start small. When I look at it objectively, I will not let the shame and guilt get the best of me. I will take on the attitude that I am preparing for a very special visitor. That person is me. I will do this for myself. I will start by removing the obvious trash and put things away. There is a place for everything. I will return things to their proper place and get things in order. I will make that my focus for this week. Nothing else. This week I will straighten up. That is a good start.

Step Two: Make a Clean Sweep

Once everything is in its place and the general clutter is thrown out or put away, I will sweep off the dust and polish it all up. I will focus on that for the second week. Everyday I will concentrate on a different room. One room at a time. I have to keep up throwing out the trash and putting things away as I do this or I will have to go back to Step One. I can deploy the troops. I will delegate the trash duty to my husband and keep reminding the kids to put their stuff where it belongs. I will do the dusting myself. As I do, I will think about the layers that I am revealing. I will get myself and my surroundings spic and span. I look forward to returning to a place where I am brightly shining. I may even give myself a facial and wear a mud mask as I clean my bathroom! Even my face will glow anew.

Step Three: Beat it Down

Now for the deep cleanse. During week three, I will take the big step and really tackle the cobwebs in the corners of my life and my house. I think I will book a massage or take a yoga class at the end of this week! I will deserve it and need it. Each day, I will take on a different project. Small things that won’t overwhelm me. I will organize my closet one evening. Clean out the refrigerator the next. I will go through the pile of mail and only keep the pertinent items and actually follow through on the pressing things. If I can’t pay a bill, I will at least make an arrangement to pay it. One evening I will devote myself to cleaning my desk and organize my file drawer. I resolve to use my desk for my work, not a place to put my jewelry and nick-nacks! On the weekend, I will ask my husband to move the sofa outside and I will get the kids to help me beat those cushions. I can’t wait to beat something!

Step Four: Company is Coming

During the final week of my March Madness, I will proceed as if I am getting ready for a party. I will make everything spic and span. I will put the spit and polish on it all. I have been wanting to get rid of all the mismatched stuff and start using the good stuff I am hoarding. Why not? I will get boxes and start in the kitchen. I will donate the dishes, glasses and pots and pans that I do not need. I will keep one set of everything. My aunt once told me I wouldn’t have so much laundry to do if I had less clothes. True. We tend to use all the dishes and every pot and pan, every spoon and fork, before we do the dishes. I am sick and tired of the pile up it causes. If we had one set, we would have to wash them every night. It will take some getting used to, but we can do it. I think I will just tackle the kitchen this week. For me, it is the main source of my disgust and disdain. I will pack up the mismatched dishes and utensils one night. I will organize the pantry the next. I will replace the shelve paper another evening. I will get the kids to clean out that junk drawer. I will clean the oven, the cabinets and counter tops and really put a shine to it. Lastly, I will fill the fridge with food for the week and get back into meal planning.

I may need some encouragement to keep it up. Can I count on you? Will you take that challenge?  Maybe we can learn something about ourselves.  If not, at least the house will be clean!

To learn more about me and how I can help you with your life’s challenges see more posts under Everything Miz Meliz. I look forward to hearing from you!

Inspiration

Posted on March 3rd, 2012 by & filed under Be Inspired

July 18, 2011

Dear Jesus,
Let my heart respond to Your Love.
If God were trying to tell me something, would I know?
If God were reassuring me or challenging me, would I notice?
I ask for the grace to be free of my own preoccupations
and open to what God may be saying to me.
In God’s loving presence I unwind the past day, starting from now and looking back, moment by moment.
I gather in all the goodness and light, in gratitude.
I attend to the shadows and what they say to me, seeking healing, courage, forgiveness.

Amen

Reassure me and open my heart to your love, Lord. . .

The “Naked Faith” of Father Ignacio

Posted on March 1st, 2012 by & filed under Be Inspired

Father Ignacio Larranaga’s Novena

You may not end up where you thought you were going….

but you will always end up where you were meant to be……

Father Ignacio is the healing priest of the Rosary. He is an excellent priest and truly cures. He has performed many miracles of healing.

This is a novena of Father Ignacio that he began the 10th of January 2005, and still has not been broken.

If you are reading this, then you have received the Novena . . . just pray a Hail Mary and ask for a special favor. You will see what will happen the 4th day after having received this.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee, blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.
Amen. (Ask for your favor)

Please do not break this Novena. Share it with others who you know believe in the power of prayer and that you believe deserve justice, peace, love, health, prosperity, and well being.

10/25/2005 – 6:10 AM PST
Interview With Father Ignacio Larranaga on Prayer

MADRID, Spain, OCT. 25, 2005 (Zenit) – A big part of Father Ignacio Larranaga’s work has been trying to teach people how to pray.

Born in Spain in 1928, he was ordained in 1952. For a time he evangelized in South America. In 1974 he began the apostolate of Meetings of Experience of God, which he taught in 33 countries over 30 years. In 1984 he founded the Prayer and Life Workshops, an ecclesial service approved by the Holy See and covering more than 40 countries.

He has now published the book “God Within,” a manual for prayer.

Q: In “God Within” you talk about “adult faith.” Is there a process of maturation in the faith?

Father Larranaga: Of course, the overcoming of a faith that is too rational or centered on the search for securities, [leading to] a faith capable of assuming all kind of risks and fears — that faith which enabled Abraham to walk in the presence of the Lord, which ended up by becoming the inspiration, center and meaning of his life.

Q: Does life without God have meaning?

Father Larranaga: We are infinite wells that infinite finites will never be able to fill. Only the infinite can satiate an infinite well. Modern culture has displaced God from the center of life, a center which has been taken over by the ego.

The consequences? Lack of solidarity; permissive morality; nothing has meaning; no one is worthwhile; the advent of nihilism, the consequence of which is an infinite void that threatens to asphyxiate humanity. And the end is suicide. A society without God ends up as a society against man.

Q: You say that what most disconcerts man is God’s silence. Is prayer the best way to be “in tune” with him?

Father Larranaga: Prayer is a way of establishing an affective current with a You, so that two presences previously known and loved make themselves mutually present, and that current is established by giving and receiving, by loving and feeling loved in the silence of the heart, in faith, in love.

Q: Can one learn how to pray?

Father Larranaga: Prayer is a gift of God, and God’s first gift. But it is also an art, as it is the convergence of grace and nature. And, as art, it is subject to the norms of learning and other psychological laws. To pray well, therefore, one needs method and discipline.

Q: Is it easy to pray?

Father Larranaga: To pray an Our Father or Hail Mary is easy. However, if it is a question of concentrating one’s mental energies on a You, in the silence of the heart, in faith, in love … to pray is not easy.

One must calm one’s nerves, let go one’s tensions, silence interior clamor, and, in the final solitude of one’s being, accept the infinite mystery of God and adore! That’s not easy.

Q: “He who feels loved by God knows not fear,” you say in “God Within.” In our fear-ridden society, does prayer liberate? Does relating to God and experiencing him do away with our fear definitively?

Father Larranaga: To live profoundly the loving and powerful presence of God, to experience his tenderness in all its depth, to live abandoned and full of confidence in his hands … all this uproots inexorably and forever the apprehensions and fears of the heart. And they are replaced by peace.

Q: People complain that they “pray and don’t change.”

Father Larranaga: One must ask if by praying they are as they would be if they didn’t pray. People make constant efforts to be patient, but no one sees it. How many silent successes there are without any one having noticed them! One cannot say so lightly, they “pray and don’t change.”

Q: Did Christ also revolutionize prayer?

Father Larranaga: Jesus called God “Abba,” “dear Daddy,” and he said: “When you pray, go into your room, shut the door and pray to your Father, who is there alone with you.”

And he also said: “Worship the Father not on this mountain, or on Mount Sinai, or in this or that temple, but in spirit and truth.” There is no greater revolution.

Q: What are the Prayer and Life Workshops?

Father Larranaga: They are a method of new evangelization in which one exercises friendship with the Lord, a radical process of purification and pacification takes place, and one undertakes the path to holiness, imitating Christ.

Q: What are the keys to realize a profound and fruitful prayer?

Father Larranaga: To persevere in patience, in pure naked faith. To remain alone with God in loving and peaceful attention, in calm and quiet. God will do the rest.

Writing is My Thing

Posted on February 27th, 2012 by & filed under A Year With Myself, Everything Miz Meliz

A Year with Myself 8:   Discovering My Thing and My True Passion

I have been pretty happy lately.  An amazing, out of this world feeling of self-confidence has centered itself in my being.  The main reason I am so happy is because I have turned a corner in my life.  I am doing something that I am truly passionate about.  I know it is the right thing for me, right now.  I am not just writing, I am considering myself a writer.  This is huge for me!  As I embark on this new adventure, I feel excitement and joy.  I am overjoyed by the possibilities and endless adventures that this road may lead.  I feel a sense of accomplishment and a new belief in myself and my abilities.  I am exhilarated, energized and ready to take on the world.  I am open to new experiences and I am making the most of the journey as it unfolds.

When I was a young girl of 11 or 12, I read a book by Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey called A Woman of Independent Means. I loved that book. I couldn’t tell you the details of the story now, but it’s coming back to me little by little. When I thought about what excited me and interested me most back then, for some reason reading that book came to mind.

I remember holding that book in my hands and turning the pages while rolling around and shifting my position on my bed. I remember the bedspread I had on my bed, it was chenille. It was so soft. I had pillow shams with yellow gingham ruffles. I had matching yellow gingham curtains. I can remember the smell of dust in my room, from the window sill above the head of my bed. 

I loved having my bed under the window. I could sit on my bed and look outside as I daydreamed of how my life would be. (I don’t ever remember having serious complications or allergies from the cool air or the dust from the window above my head, but my mother must have warned me about this because I have never allowed my children to have their bed under the window.) Our house was north facing and my bedroom windows faced north. Where I lived we had a robust north wind we called the Santa Ana’s that would hit the front of our house like a slap in the face. It caused lots of dust and leaves to blow on our front porch and at our windows. It made a whistling noise through the windows at night that sounded like howling or crying. (My mother told me never buy a house that faces north, and I didn’t.)

My mom gave me the book A Woman of Independent Means to read, and I loved it. I had no idea then that it was my mother who truly inspired me to be such a woman. Or, that my mother herself was such a woman. I thought to myself back then, “I want a life worth writing about.”

My mother told me lots of things. She gave lots of advice. She told me I could do or be whatever I wanted. She never put restrictions on me. She believed I would learn on my own about the bed being under the windows, as she did about most things. Some things were absolutely not allowed when I was growing up, such as drinking, smoking, and sex. My mom warned me that if I did those things I would get caught and that the truth always comes out . I needed to learn on my own, I guess.  She was right, she did find out!  I caused so much hurt and pain for my mother, because she wanted the best for me. She wanted me to not experience the hurt and pain. But, I learned on my own.

Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey wrote her novel as a series of letters, correspondence and announcements. Reading that book had a big impact on me in many ways. I knew I wanted to keep a journal. I knew written correspondence was important to me. Remembering details was also important and I fine tuned that ability at a young age. I am not good at remembering specific historical dates or even names of famous people, but I have a recall about who, what, where and when as it applies to my own experience. After all, I remembered the title and author of a book I loved over thirty years ago!

I knew I wanted to have experiences in life that would help me to write my own story, or to write a novel like Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey did, that was based on the experiences of her grandmother’s life.

I committed myself to writing about ten years ago when I turned to it as a solace. I was going through depression and dealing with stress from so many things at a time when I was not working outside the home and was caring for my three small children. I always said I would write a novel, or a screen play, or a book of poetry. I was not ready to go forward with it at the time. I did more research than anything else. I poured my heart and soul out in my journals. But I could not think of sharing them with anyone, unless I read the entries aloud so I could see an immediate reaction.

The desire to be a writer has always been there, as it has popped up and tested the waters many times in my life. At no time has it ever felt as real as it does to me right now. The desire is so strong I feel it burning inside me. It’s taking off on its own. It has a life of its own. I keep doing things that propel me in this direction and they aren’t taking any effort at all. What is different from the many attempts of the past? I can say simply this, “Now, I am ready.”

I downloaded the book that I read as a girl by Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey on my Kindle ap. I did not realize that the book had been republished in 1998. I read it in 1979 or 1980 just after it was originally published in 1978. While searching for it on Amazon, I was reminded that it was made into a television mini series starring Sally Field, one of my favorite actresses. I don’t recall seeing the mini series when it was televised.

A Novel by Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey

The coolest thing about rediscovering this book now is that there is an updated preface in the book that Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey wrote in 1998. She was close to my age when her work was first published and she wrote it while raising her two small daughters. She says that “the traditional advice to writers is to ‘write what you know.’ I always amend that to ‘write what you can imagine knowing’.” I feel as though she is speaking directly to me and it is at this moment in my life that I needed to hear these words from the woman who first inspired me to write so long ago.

I never would have said at ten years old that I wanted to be a writer when I grew up. I am sure I said I wanted to be a mother, that I wanted to travel, be famous, have a big house and a convertible! I wanted lots of things. Looking back, I realize that I did always want to be a writer like Elizabeth Forsythe Hailey.

Writing is my thing!

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